‘Adulthood na scam. You have to hustle to make a living 24/7. Nobody go ask if you don chop. Nobody send you free money. If you no get, na you sabi. Adulthood na scam.’
Maybe you don’t remember when you first borrowed money as an adult, but many of us have been in that situation where you just don’t have a choice. But some people have made this their norm– going about taking money from others day in, day out.
If you have found yourself in this state or you’re trying to avoid it, read to the end.
1. Borrowing does NOT make you shine…
‘Borrow borrow make me shine’ is a phrase from the Nigerian pidgin English used to taunt people known for borrowing to look better or to ‘shine’…
The subtitle above is not a mistake, because ‘borrow borrow’ actually does not make you shine in the long run.
It is easier to borrow money than to repay, easier to lend than collect -David S. Landes
Let us clear the air, first of all. Borrowing money when in dire need is not bad. Situations and circumstances in life can often push someone to the wall and make borrowing inevitable. The unpardonable aspect of borrowing is when it is not repaid, too often, and/or leads to disputes.
People borrow money for a ton of reasons and no matter the amount and who you borrowed the money from you are expected to return it at the agreed time.
A person borrowing money with no foreseeable plan or means to pay back is calling for trouble. You know you don’t have the means of returning this money you are borrowing and yet you are going ahead to borrow. The money will not suddenly appear, so you have to plan properly on how you can pay it back.
Whether you are borrowing from an organisation or an individual does not change the fact that you are owing and still need to pay.
2. Before borrowing from a friend, decide which you need more, the money or the friend. The issue of borrowing and lending between friends has caused a lot of rifts between people. Some have lost valuable friendships because of a lack of integrity and ability to keep to their word. When a friend or family helps you out please don’t turn your back on them and ignore them when the time to pay up comes, be true and return their money.
Our relationship with money has a way of reflecting on our reputation and character. Some people borrow money and still have a good reputation because they abide by the rules and do not evade when it is time to pay.
Of course, things might be difficult and situations can prevent you from paying back, communicate this to the person you borrowed from in clear terms.
3. Here are a few tips to keep you from being tagged a chronic borrower:
1. Live within your means- You will easily fall into problems regarding your finances if you have not learnt to live within your means. Cut your coat according to your cloth and save yourself the unnecessary worry about keeping up with what people think of or expect from you. Track your spending regularly and be accountable.
2. Consider your financial capabilities before you embark on a project- To avoid getting stuck with no other option than to borrow, think about what you are about to venture into and decide if you have the means to consistently service it.
3. Borrow only for the right reasons- Even if you are ever to borrow money, do it only for the right reasons. For example, you can get some extra money as capital to start a business or project that promises to bring returns in the long run. Don’t borrow money to fund a party or travel, unless you have a sure means of returning the money.
4. If you are currently owing someone money, take these tips and stay safe out there…
1. Communicate- Please communicate with the person you are owing as often as possible! Don’t assume they know or they will understand. If there will be a delay before you pay back, let them know. Don’t be quiet and ghost them all of a sudden. It doesn’t look good at all. It hurts relationships and puts the lender on edge unnecessarily.
2. Don’t flaunt money you don’t have- How can the person you are owing be seeing your posts on how you are ‘chopping life’? You owe someone and you are going from one party to another, spending money and living the life, while posting it all over social media. Even if you don’t have the money, your lender will think you have and you have just refused to pay. We are not advocating against posting and enjoying your life, but please apply wisdom.
3. Be humble- The humility with which some people use to borrow money is not the same after they get the money. The whole change of attitude is just not necessary and it does not even speak well of you. Be consistent in your attitude, remember this person helped you in a time of need, so be humble.
Borrowing is a very dicey topic so avoid getting comfortable with that lifestyle as much as you can. It does not make you shine, in fact, it can destroy your reputation. Stick to all the tips given above if you find yourself owing someone and gradually work your way out of that debt.
May God help you in all your endeavours!
